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Its not the first time this is happening, neither will it be last. An urge to cry, break into tears, yell, explode. At the same time control the tears for your office desk is not the place.

the feeling is like - buying a land on the riverside hoping to make heaven out of it. Toil to sow and cultivate fruits, flowers and big trees, animals - cows, dogs and birds - my idea of heaven. And then it never rains. Your land is barren now - a vast emptiness lies before you as you kneel and weep your heart out. Someone bought his SUV, someone built his 5 star luxury housing complex and your are paying the price because you need the rain for the little heaven of your dreams. The SUV wallah & the guy in the luxurious apartment are digging bore-wells for their dreams.

No longer is someone singing for happiness or writing poems or gardening. All of this and more is done for money - to buy SUVs & 5 star luxury apartments. Are we earning to live or living to earn?

I didn't let the feeling pass today. I wrote at the speed I thought & felt. I wept through words. I am glad I did. Probably I am one step closer to my heaven.